Little Bitch

You can also listen to the podcast:

Little Bitch Series

The Stressed Achiever

The Stressed Achiever works towards her goals and sets out to accomplish them at all costs. Only problem is, eventually she'll break and eat everything in sight.

 

 

Being a little bitch takes time. Being a little bitch is a compilation of really crappy thinking patterns that to your unconscious mind, serve a really good purpose – to keep you just as you are. The only problem is that our conscious mind, or the part of your mind that makes decisions wants to grow. Our mind is literally a battle zone every single day. (For in-depth instruction go to http://www.laurenherrera.com/363)

Both minds want to be in charge.

At Growth-U we have 7 distinct operating systems or patterns our unconscious mind will run when it senses you’re changing or growing. It’s a sabotaging behavior we are unaware of or are aware of but don’t know how to stop.

When we get significance from the hard of doing we set out on an uphill trek to (maybe) achieving goals. Two things happen:

  1. We might not get to our goal because we create a lot of resistant energy
  2. We bulldoze everything in our path; relationships, environment and health

This, by the way, is my go-to pattern. Objectively, I think this is my pattern because I lived in two homes growing up and thought life was hard. I created a story that achieving is hard. That personal life is hard. That professional life is hard. So for me, when things are easy and peaceful my unconscious mind runs this pattern to create what feels normal.

I add more projects to my plate and stress over them.

When you're a stressed achiever in your diet you...

Set unrealistic goals and overwork yourself

Maybe you want to lose 30 pounds in 60 days for a trip to Cabo. So you cut out all your favorite foods and hit the gym daily. Only, that lasts just 3 weeks or less. You think having a hot body, one totally opposite to yours has to come with great sacrifice of what you eat and what you do. Not only that, but you actually hate eating all this new food. You hate working out. And your body doesn't actually want to do the workouts and you get hurt. You snap at your partner, your kids, your colleagues and your friends. The quality of your life sinks along with your body fat percentage.

This isn't sustainable

So what happens? We feel out of control and we think we can't keep up. And since we can't keep up we give up...and eat everything in sight!

 

Let's put on some big girl panties!

  1. Set realistic goals and know your idol
    1. Set out to implement a lifestyle change. Add a glass of water or meal replacement shake daily to crowd out unhealthy food.
    2. If you see someone with drastic results in a short amount of time consider the lifestyle leading up to the transformation.
  2. Happily Achieve
    1. Get pleasure from the process of becoming fit. Truly fit people don't get there and stop what they did to get fit. They had a slow becoming and it's who they are,
    2. If it's all about getting there, you'll never be happy because there at a body weight or dress size might not look or feel the way you expected.
  3. Get present with gratitude
    1. Appreciate all you have and all you are now to avoid stressing about what's ahead

Feeling happy in the moment is key to end the Stressed Achiever pattern

And then, you'll

start eating like a boss!

You can also listen to the podcast:

Little Bitch Series

The Escapist

The Escapist doesn’t want to face reality or admit she’s on a life path that isn’t working – so she numbs out or escapes in food.

 

Being a little bitch takes time. Being a little bitch is a compilation of really crappy thinking patterns that to your unconscious mind, serve a really good purpose – to keep you just as you are. The only problem is that our conscious mind, or the part of your mind that makes decisions wants to grow. Our mind is literally a battle zone every single day. (For in-depth instruction go to http://www.laurenherrera.com/363)

Both minds want to be in charge.

At Growth-U we have 7 distinct operating systems or patterns our unconscious mind will run when it senses you’re changing or growing. It’s a sabotaging behavior we are unaware of or are aware of but don’t know how to stop.

For me personally this was one of my most severe patterns that caused me to over eat. So many times When I felt dissatisfied with life, myself and my relationships I ate to fill the void. When I felt stressed from business or responsibilities I’d eat to distract myself from my emotions. This is the pattern I see most women run into and the most relevant to the statement…

It’s not about the food.

When we can dive into our mind, the deepest recesses of our soul, we will find the voids that desire to be filled. And by diving into our mind objectively and with empathy we will be less reliant on escaping through food.

 

If you:

  • Watch crime dramas or sad tv shows/movies before bed
  • Primarily feel dissatisfied in your relationship(s)
  • Are more aware of things to be dissatisfied than satisfied with

You’ll probably run the escapist pattern pretty often and reach for food to create satisfaction in your life.

Do this:

  • Find 5 things you appreciate about YOURSELF and your LIFE
  • Fill your mind with meditations (laurenherrera.com/meditations) before bed instead of negative tv
  • Look for things all day everyday to appreciate

You’ll make law of attraction work for you, not against you.

Thought proceeds action. If we train ourselves to appreciate our life now, we will attraction more things to appreciate. If we have more and more things to appreciate about our life we will not feel the need to escape through food. Remember, thoughts have mass, what we think about most of the time is our vibration, the frequency at which we attract people and experiences into our life. If we are filling our unconscious mind with negativity before bed we are supercharging our brain to perceive our life in that way. Our mind doesn’t know the difference between what is real and what is imagined. It’s also highly suggestible 20 minutes before sleep and after sleep. In order to have a life you don’t want to escape from fill it with things you enjoy!

 

You know what I’m going to say, pretty soon….

start eating like a boss!

You can also listen to the podcast:

Little Bitch Series

The Pretender

A Pretender doesn’t like who she is & doesn’t want other people to have to be around the awful person she thinks she is.

 

Being a little bitch takes time. Being a little bitch is a compilation of really crappy thinking patterns that to your unconscious mind, serve a really good purpose – to keep you just as you are. The only problem is that our conscious mind, or the part of your mind that makes decisions wants to grow. Our mind is literally a battle zone every single day. (For in-depth instruction go to http://www.laurenherrera.com/363)

Both minds want to be in charge.

At Growth-U we have 7 distinct operating systems or patterns our unconscious mind will run when it senses you’re changing or growing. It’s a sabotaging behavior we are unaware of or are aware of but don’t know how to stop.

I’m just going to have to dive in here with both feet. This episode really surprised me because now, having grown so much and possessing the ability to observe my emotions most of the time, I see how I was running the pretender pattern for TWO YEARS when I had my gym. Nowadays I see Little Bitch patterns as little flare ups when I’m creating a new vision for myself and lasting only a few hours or days.

Before I recorded this episode I really had to reflect on the pattern of the Pretender and when I realized I ran it for such a long time my mind was blown. 20/20 vision is awesome because now I can have empathy for my former self and say, “Wow girl! You took on so much in a short amount of time. You had to live in a BRAND NEW IDENTITY without any preparation. OF COURSE you were in deception!”

So here’s the list of features in my new identity that I handled without any prep:

  • Open a boutique gym in Old Town Pasadena (60 miles from new home)
  • Get married
  • Become a step-mom
  • 50/50 custody of kids and schedule work around them
  • Live half the week at your mom’s to cut back on driving
  • Murder of a childhood friend
  • Break up with childhood friend (not mentioned on show)

 

I was afraid of who I was on the inside

I had a lot of unhappy feelings, I had a lot of anger and resentment towards others and myself. I had zero boundaries. Work was my escape from home and home was my escape from work. Nothing was INTERNALLY joyous to me, but I acted like I was happy. I was really miserable and I felt that if I voiced how I felt about being a step-mom people would judge me. I felt if I voiced I was scared shitless about being a business owner they’d think I was a fraud. Literally one woman knew my deep down secret thoughts…and a psychotherapist. I feared I was a narcissist so I had a few sessions with him! You can check him out -> https://stevenunruh.com

Do you dislike who you are?

The two of the six human emotional needs you’ll use to start liking yourself are GROWTH and self-love/self-esteem. Pour yourself into communities that support growth; like a weekly meditation class through your local community college, temple, church, personal development programs, books, etc.

Understand that LOVE IS A FORCE, it isn’t an emotion. Love is the creative power of the universe, just look at children who aren’t held. They don’t fully develop. They remain small in body and mind – they do not develop fully.

“But how could simply being in an orphanage kill a baby? Basically, they die from lack of love. When an infant falls below the threshold of physical affection needed to stimulate the production of growth hormone and the immune system, his body starts shutting down.

Research suggests a physiological pathway that produces this effect, which was first understood as “runt syndrome” in mammals. In litters of puppies and kittens — even in rats and mice — oftentimes one or two animals are significantly smaller than the rest.” Excerpt from How Orphanages Kill Babies 

When we know LOVE is a force, it’s easier to believe we are lovable

Self-love doesn’t mean you have to shower yourself with arbitrary compliments or be totally in love with all parts of your body, mind or life — we are human, ya know! It means that if we recognize the creative force of the universe not only created us but IS US, we can say, “just for this simple fact that I am LOVE, I will love myself. I cannot deny what I am.”

The staircase will reveal itself

To review, because if you’re anything like me self-love is a hard one to grasp do this to start liking who you are so you don’t have to pretend:

  • Cut yourself some slack, give yourself some grace. You may be living a life that formed itself without direction, so you actually don’t have a navigation system to direct you.
  • Proactively grow, seek help from a professional, read self-help books, listen to podcasts like this one and surround yourself with supportive people.
  • Love yourself because you are love. You don’t have to like EVERYTHING about yourself, but you can intellectually say, “I am made of love, therefore I am love,” and then…Law of Attraction will start bringing more positive, loving experiences to support your transformation.

…and then, you’ll

start eating like a boss!

You can also listen to the podcast:

Little Bitch Series

The Success Seeker

A Success Seeker keeps looking for outside herself for something she already has inside. She’s externally motivated.

 

Being a little bitch takes time. Being a little bitch is a compilation of really crappy thinking patterns that to your unconscious mind, serve a really good purpose – to keep you just as you are. The only problem is that our conscious mind, or the part of your mind that makes decisions wants to grow. Our mind is literally a battle zone every single day. (For in-depth instruction go to http://www.laurenherrera.com/363)

Both minds want to be in charge.

At Growth-U we have 7 distinct operating systems or patterns our unconscious mind will run when it senses you’re changing or growing. It’s a sabotaging behavior we are unaware of or are aware of but don’t know how to stop. In this and the next 6 podcast episodes I’ll be sharing with you what the patterns are and how you can change them…

I get it, you’re empathetic, tuned in, tapped in, turned on — you’re spiritual. And when you don’t feel aligned or in flow with what you’re doing you want to stop. I get it. And there is some truth to being in flow and things being easy. Heck! The amount of content I “put out” is easy because I am aligned with my vision. Of course there are times I don’t feel like doing the means, but my end, my vision is too big to let little stuff drag me down.

A Success Seeker constantly looks outside herself for answers.

What happens is this; we set a goal to lose weight or become more fit and we motivate ourselves by EXTERNAL FEEDBACK.

  • To get the man or woman we have our eyes on.
  • To make the women in the gym envious of our hot body.
  • To get the adoration of others.

So, if the diet or exercise program we’re on gets hard (which it will), and you say to yourself or your bestie, “I just don’t think this is right for me. I don’t feel aligned with it.” YOU’RE right! You aren’t aligned with it because you aren’t getting the EXTERNAL feedback!

Welcome to deception, honey!

Here are your BIG. GIRL. PANTIES!

We have to work backwards from your goal one step at a time…That way the means (the diet, the exercise, the meditation, the journaling) will become more and more doable because they will become enjoyable because they will bring you to your goal.

  1. Create your vision/desired outcome/goal (whatever you want to call it)
  2. Create 3 reasons why you want it
  3. Imagine how you’d feel when you experienced those reasons
  4. Take inspired action daily towards those experiences

Here’s what I mean:

  • Desired Outcome: Lose 10 pounds
  • Reasons:
    • I want to feel sexy naked
    • I want to feel more comfortable in my clothes
    • I want to feel accomplished – that I did what I said I’d do
  • Set a timer for 5 minutes every day and imagine how you’d feel if your reasons were your reality
  • Everyday look for a small way to experience your reasons
    • Look at yourself in the mirror and say, “this is all good. Look at those legs that carry me through the world. Look at those arms that embrace others. Look at my waist that holds all my magical organs!”
    • Get rid of clothes you feel terrible in! Even if it’s just one shirt a week!
    • Set mini goals daily, like adding a glass of water with each meal

This way, when the means gets tough – you don’t want to workout, you want to binge – YOU WILL STILL BE ALIGNED with it because your vision is motivated internally. The stimulus from the outside in won’t affect you!

Pretty soon, you’ll

start eating like a boss!

You can also listen to the podcast:

Little Bitch Series

The Certainty Seeker

A Certainty Seeker doesn't believe until she sees, which unfortunately is a massive block to transforming.

 

Seeing before believing is impossible. We must all have a thought before we experience. That's why people have all different types of experiences of the same factual event.

Needing to know the "how" of getting your results, demanding to have proof of purchase so to speak, is a sure fire way to stop growing and actually SOLIDIFY YOUR STUCKNESS.

When we create a vision or desired outcome to be sexier, leaner, stronger, healthier, more vibrant and energetic we don't need to know the how.

The how is material and not our job to be an expert in.

Our job is to say, "I want THIS!" and then believe we can do it. As they say, you don't need to see the whole staircase, just the first step.

When we play the little bitch pattern of Certainty Seeker, refer to ep. 363 for the full overview of the cycle of growth, we are egotistically, small human-minded DEMANDING we understand the great unconscious mind, our creative abilities and potential - God, whatever your higher power is.

We are demanding to know, to be an expert in something we have no expertise in.

I mean, are you a fitness professional?

Have you studied alllllllllllll there is to know in exercise and metabolism?

When we demand to know the HOW we stunt our creativity and we don't even try. That's a really sucky place to be. Our conscious mind's job is to grow. So if we stunt that HUMAN EMOTIONAL NEED, we will become increasingly unhappy.

The pattern on "The Certainty Seeker" is most likely going to show up for you before you see results. It's going to show up to PREVENT you from getting started.

You'll stay stuck.

When we play this pattern we are looking for certainty outside ourselves. And certainty from the outside in can be devastating when that foundation of confidence crumbles or even dies.

Ready for your BIG. GIRL. PANTIES?

I've actually got 3 pairs for you.

  • First, you must teach YOURSELF that you are your only source of certainty. You are in charge of your life, your decisions and the meaning you give experiences
  • Second, you must discipline your imagination to focus on what you want (belief & faith) not what you don't want (fear & uncertainty)
  • Third, you must LOVE YOURSELF. And I don't mean you have to be lovey-dovey, head over heals, you just have to BE NICE and ENCOURAGING to yourself

These 3 panties combined will help you believe in yourself to...

start eating like a boss!

 

You can also listen to the podcast:

Little Bitch Series

The Rut Dweller

A rut dweller feels overwhelmed by what she has going on or what she “should” be doing that instead of moving forward towards her goals, she sinks deeper into stuckness and yo-yo dieting.

 

Imagine being stuck in a muddy ravine or a ditch. You can see a bright beautiful sky right above you. You can see birds, flowers and trees. You can see a gentle breeze blowing through the branches and blades of grass.

But you can’t experience it.

You can see it, you know it’s there, but it’s not your experience.

You know it’s possible – but it isn’t your reality.

Your reality is literal mud. It’s sticky, it smells and you can’t move out of it.

When you’re in a rut you know what to do — but you can’t actually do it.

 

It’s knowing if you ate a serving of vegetables, drank at least a bottle of water or went on a daily walk you’d see changes in your body. It’s knowing that instead of snacking on chips you chose grapes, but you still can’t fucking do it! You feel overwhelmed with all the information out there, all the diets to choose from bounce around in your head that you have no idea which one to pick so you don’t actually do anything healthy!

I’ve been there – multiple times in a various areas of life!

Rut Dwellers reach for carbs!

When we feel overwhelmed by our to-do list or feel like we should be doing something other than what we are doing at the moment we get depressed. Our feel good brain chemicals get washed out by defeat — we feel like it’s too late for us to change. I mean, we’ve already tried every diet (for 4 days)! We feel like there isn’t hope for us and we missed the happy, successful boat. What is our brain going to do now!? It will find the fastest way to raise the feel good chemicals – endorphins…and it will do that through high glycemic carbohydrates.

It’s not that carbs are bad. Want to build beautiful muscle? You need carbs.

 

Carbs are detrimental when we don’t stress our muscles – when we haven’t earned them.

And that, eating an exponential amount of carbs out of pity is a binge, a yo-yo. You were doing so well on your eating plan that when your unconscious mind felt the change she was like, “oh hell to the no! YOU SUCK! Remember!? Remember all the times you tried and failed? This time is no different. You suck. You’ll never change. You’re an idiot, why would actually follow through this time?

 

And then, eat carbs.

Let’s. Put. On. Some. Big. Girl. Panties!

Like yesterday’s episode (laurenherrera.com/364) we’re going to use on of our six emotional needs. Did you forget what those needs are?

  • Certainty (what we used for the victim pattern)
  • Variety
  • Significance
  • Self-love/self-esteem
  • Growth
  • Contribution

The panties we’re going to put on today are the ones for growth. Now this is going to be a leetle bit tricky because we’re adding to a potential to-do list that leads to overwhelm..However, if we keep the growth small and daily-ish we will be able to get out of our rut.

First, imagine you’re stuck in a muddy rut. It’s thick, sticky, moist and you keep sinking. How can we get rid of some of this mud? We can add dirt to it! Say wha? Yes, you heard me. Add dry dirt to it, obviously from a friend who is standing outside of the rut and little by little that dirt will absorb moisture from the mud, the rut will get more and more shallow until you’ll walk your ass right out of that rut!

That dirt is your growth habits.

Growing, as an essential human need means we are developing, learning, strengthening, expanding, and cultivating ourselves.

Every time we add a glass of water to our day we are cultivating our healthy lifestyle.

Every time we listen to a positive podcast we are developing our growth mindset.

Every time we exercise daily, or even just 3 days a week we are strengthening our body.

 

Growing with small actions daily will get you out of the rut.

And when you’re out of the rut, in your power, you won’t be reaching for carbs!

 

You will start eating like a boss.

 

You can also listen to the podcast:

Little Bitch Series

The Victim

A victim makes people and events responsible for their life. As painful as an experience is, that totally warrants being a victim, it doesn’t serve us in the long run towards growth and expansion because we will never be accountable for our own actions.

 

First, we must be responsible for our thoughts, for they have mass and a vibrational frequency. We must be a vibrational match to perpetrators when we are physically assaulted and harmed. Yes, this even goes for babies and children. Law of Attraction says “like attracts like.” It doesn’t mean we intentionally think about being assaulted, how could we in infancy? It means we must match vibrational energy.

So, if we have a predominately low vibration and we match the low vibration of a perpetrator, we have the event. If you “believe in” law of attraction for the success you seek in your life, you must have your mind open to law of attraction in this negative way as well.

After we become victim in the physical realm our next step is to react or to respond.

We can overeat to the point of obesity to create external certainty that if we are undesirable to a perpetrator we won’t be harmed again we will always yo-yo diet because that reactive unconscious program is running. Or, we can respond. A response would be searching for lessons in the assault.

How did this shape who I am?

What have I learned?

How have I grown because of this event?

What am I grateful for about myself in spite of this event?

Being a victim can show up as being annoyed.

When we make other people responsible for our emotions. “My boss is such a dick…I need girl time to vent.” and proceed to have 4 drinks and 2 high fat, high carb, high calorie appetizers we relinquish our power and our goals to the boss. They become the boss of our life. We don’t hit our goals of weight loss or increasing health, but in a way we are ok with it — because it wasn’t actually our fault.

We think the diet didn’t work.

We say we’ll start again on Monday.

We think it’s the food.

But, it’s the pattern. Our victim pattern keeps us reaching for food to numb out our stress or unconsciously make us appear undesirable.

How do we change this?

Here.Are.Your.Big.Girl.Panties.

You fulfill one of six emotional needs – to be specific…certainty. And you can’t create certainty from the outside in by relying on a person or finances. That will bite you in the ass big time! Your certainty must come from within. It’s your higher power, God, Jesus, Alah, physcology, philosophy, spirituality, universal laws, it’s what you believe in. That’s where your certainty is and grows. So, read a book, go to church, to temple, listen to a podcast, a youtube channel. Immerse yourself in whatever positive, uplifting thing you believe in.

Your certainty will grow.

Your power will grow.

Your accountability will grow.

Your choice will grow.

Your overeating will shrink.

Your compulsive eating will shrink.

Your obsession with meal time will shrink.

You will start eating like a boss.

Listen to the episode, share with your friends and let me know how it impacted you!

(This episode was a combination of Growth-U’s Cycle of Performance teaching model and my 18 yrs fitness experience)